A Mom's Life

School break is right around the corner and I bet all of you parents and kiddies are planning a family trip. Whether adventuring somewhere warm or simply taking a long weekend in the hills, it's important to be prepared and have the right attitude. I recently sat down with one of most well known family travelers, who puts the "What the FU..." in family fun. Feel free to take notes on the Travel Top 10 from Handy Andy. 10: Don't set an Estimated Time of Departure. Keep your options open. Not setting a specific time to leave makes your kids more excitable and agitated, which is exactly the temperament you'd like your children to have before locking them in a moving box for hours on end. 9: Make sure to pack snacks for the ride. Like chocolate frosted donuts. 8: Nothing makes a long car ride better than asking the family to play the "quiet game" while you participate in a conference call. 7: It's not about the destination. It's about the jo...

Whenever I introduce myself to someone, locally, the first thing they ask me is, "Do you know Andrew?" Of course, I want to say something sarcastic because that's the kind of girl I am, but instead, I smile and reply, "Why yes, he's my husband." Usually they continue by telling me how great he is and how much he's helped their organization, that they think he's a great landlord, blah, blah blah. Oh, and half of the time, someone throws in that he looks like Ben Affleck. I want to tell them that, while that's all fine and dandy, I wish Ben would put his shoes away, fold his pants instead of throwing them on the couch, and take less time in the bathroom each day. With all seriousness, though, I'm really proud of all that he does for the community and always have been. When I met Andy, 14 years ago, I was very selfish. I cared about me, me, and me. There may have been a few select others who I cared about, but mostly, yeah, just me. Andy was ...

Andy is a man of many caves. He has the office at our house. It's a dark and creepy place, a labyrinth. The light from the almost hidden window casts mysterious shadows on stacks of paper, boxes- large and small- and cords. Lots and lots of cords. The door to this cave always stays shut. I'm afraid to go in. I'm afraid to look in. Andy disappears in the cave, from time to time. I've considered tying a rope around his waist, and providing him with a headlamp and a bottle of water before he goes in. I don't know what goes on in that cave and I don't want to know. Andy's next cave is the garage. When we moved in, it was a lovely, large, 2-bay with a loft above. Now, it is a vortex. The Great UpState Garbage Patch. One must certainly bring their spelunking gear with them when entering our garage. Good hiking boots are a necessity. Also, bring a headlamp, a walking stick, and maybe some mace. I'm pretty sure things that don't have legs move in our gara...

When I was little, relatives from Arkansas used to visit us for a week. Within just a few days of their arrival, my usual Yankee tongue would turn into an odd twang, as words became an an odd mix of Southern drawl and rhotic severity. My family used to poke fun at me for something I don't think I consciously intended to do. I was a little chameleon, soaking up all around me. I think, too, I knew back then that, "When in Rome, do as the Romans." Even if I was actually in Massachusetts, doing as the Southerners. To survive we must adapt. I realize, with respect to communication, this is what I have done. I'm me in all situations, and most people, whether at work, home, or socially, would agree that I'm loud, like attention, am (sorta?) funny, outgoing, and bossy. They'd tell you I step to the beat of a slightly off-beat drummer but that I usually mean well, I like helping people, and I enjoy communicating. (They will also tell you other bad things, but they c...

It's been weeks since my last post and I'd like to blame my new gig for that. The New Year has started off with a bang at work, leaving me with little time to write, and frankly, little time to think about writing. Unless, it's a memo, or email, or proposal, in which case I seem to be writing a lot. As I figure out how to balance going back to work full-time while still doing all the things at home that still need to be done, please allow me time to find my humor and wit. It will return. In the meantime, here's a glimpse into my world during this amazing month we call January. Gray I wake up to gray. All day it is gray, gray, gray. Gray, please go away. Cold I wake up to cold. All day it is cold, cold, cold. Cold,please go away Snowmageddon Two feet! Three feet! Snow! Close down the subways, go home! Oops, just a dusting. Running Jillian Michaels on YouTube while Caro dresses. Just not the same thing. Mistakes It's true. I can't lie....

I first met met her the last year of college. My college roommate introduced me to her. It was spring and I was feeling anxious about the uncertain future. I was also feeling crappy about how my vegetarian (aka cheese and bread)diet and college lethargy allowed me to gained 20 pounds in 4 years. It was a spring morning and we met on the track. At first, I didn't like her at all. I kind of hated her, really. She made me mad. She made me tired. She made me doubt myself. She even made me feel embarrassed. Why did my college roommate want to introduce her to me? Why would she be so mean, I wondered. It wasn't until months, and years, later, as our relationship developed, deepened, and flourished, that I began to thank my roommate for this gift. Over time, we have fallen in love. It's a love story really, one that, I hope, will stand the test of time. It's love that has grown through pain, through change, through time and age and space and reality. It's a love story c...

Can you believe that not everybody likes my blog? I think it's funny and I usually get a good chuckle when I write a post. It's always a shock when someone doesn't seem to like my blown-out-of-proportion, dramatic, passionate, and sarcastic virtual musings. I try not to take it personally, but my blog is very personal so it puts me between a rock and a hard place if someone thinks what I wrote sucks. Or, maybe they don't think it sucks, but they disagree with my point of view. (What a shame.) Here's an example, recently someone in my life read my last post and was very confused about why I would write a whole post outlining how awful it is to be a parent and then end with a statement about how I love my children more than anything else in the whole wide world. I should mention that this person is a DINK. No, I didn't call them a bad name. This person really is a DINK- Dual Income. No Kids. Not all DINKS want to be DINKS but some do. I think it's great tha...