Skip to main content

Sports Apparel and Me

I once read in a fashion magazine that wearing work out clothes when not exercising is a major fashion faux pas. On my days outside the office, a sports bra, tank top, and exercise shorts are my uniform. Is this because I have no taste in clothes? Possibly. Is this because I'd be a great candidate for What Not to Wear? Probably. Is it because I have no money to buy clothes not intended for work? Likely. Is it mostly because I work out each morning and then do not have five minutes to shower or change until the kids go to bed (and then I switch from running tights to sweat pants). Why yes, yes it is.

When you have kids, particularly little mobile ones, you must have your eyes on them at all times. Now, my mom is tisking at this post already. I can hear her reprimanding me for not having a play pen. We are not a play pen generation. I've rarely seen a child in a Pack 'N Play for anything other than sleep or a diaper change. We are a continuation of our predecessors-helicopter parents. We hover over our kids and monitor their every move. More or less. And with good reason. It's draining to parent and be "on guard" 24/7 and we've all slipped up every once in awhile and when the cats away, the mouse will play. Honestly, it's not even when I'm being a "bad mom" that the trouble happens. It's not like I'm sitting out in my hammock talking on the phone while Char is inside pulling out knives from the kitchen drawers.

Hell brakes loose in a matter of seconds. I have many decisions to make each day about how to maintain my authority before mutiny on the bounty. For example, say Caro is watching Barbie (eck, I know!) and Char is on the potty. I want to stay nearby to verify the pee and dish out the reward cookie but I also hear the washer beep. I should get the wet clothes out and switch them to the dryer before I forget until hours later when I have to rewash because the clothes now smell like mildew. What do I do? Uh, uh...ok the laundry room is 10 steps away and it will take me 30 seconds to do the switch and then 10 steps back. I risk it. I race down the hall and back just in time to witness Caroline pasting Band Aids all over herself and giggling while Charlotte, now totally naked, swishes the plunger around in the toilet.

Scene two: I fill the tub with perfect temperature water and just the right amount of bubbles and get each of the girls in. Then, the phone rings and I've been waiting for a call to schedule and important appointment. Ring! Ring! Ring! I've been waiting all day for the call. What do I do?! I again, make the mad dash to the nearest phone, the whole time thinking, "A kid can drown in a teaspoon of water. Never move more than an arm's length from a child in water." I answer the phone and run back to the bathroom. The kids are still breathing. As a matter of fact, they are trying to make a tidal wave by standing up and simultaneously jumping and landing cross-legged onto their fannies. There's now an inch of water in the tub and the whole floor is covered with bubbles.

Between breakfast, craft time, snack time, laundry, potty runs, more snacks, lunch, more laundry, riding bikes, cuddles after knee scrapes, tea party play, referreing spats, snack, meltdowns, dinner, bath, story and getting a glass of water, and one more potty run-in addition to stopping multiple attempts to open the front door and escape into yard, hiding the plunger, Q-tips, sanitary napkins, and Chapstick, creating a makeshift lock to the fridge, finding dirty diapers that have been removed and hidden under bed sheets, cleaning kissy marks from the flat screen, and picking up the toys for the millionth time, I just don't seem to have the time to take a shower and gussy myself up for the viewing pleasure of the rest of the world.

Lucky for me, we live upstate and not in some chic metropolitan area where it really would be embarrassing for me to dress this way all day, from the gym to the grocery store to the coffee shop, to pick up Caro at school, or to the pediatrician's office. If anyone here thinks I am tacky, I haven't heard about it.

What I have heard about is this, "Um, excuse me, is that your child over there removing all 200 seed packets from the display rack while you try to buy a bag of mulch?" Good thing I still have my sneakers on for yet another mad dash.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Somebody Who Matters

At first glance, one may not think that my mom and I are alike. Moe is shy and reserved. She's calm and thoughtful. She's a good listener and keeps things to herself. She's grounded and sensible. She's practical. You may be laughing now if you know me. I'm loud and outspoken. I'm dramatic and irrational. I talk too much and share too much. My head is often in the clouds and I lack common sense. I 'm a dreamer. How did this kid come from that mom? Well, if you know me, you also know that my mom has had the greatest impact on me and that we are actually very much alike. For example, Moe isn't really shy or reserved. She's just waiting for the right time to tell you what she thinks and you're going to hear it whether or not you like it. She uses the F-bomb freely, and sometimes inappropriately. In her own right, she is a feminist. She's a loyal friend. She's the family organizer. She has a quirky sense of humor and knows not to take hersel...

Facebook Reality Check

I am a big facebook user. No, I don't play Farmville or Candy Crush Saga but I spend at least 15 minutes on the site daily. I have read many articles about how facebook kills one's self esteem because people use the site to boast and brag about their awesome lives, which in turn makes others feel badly about their own. We all know that facebook is a slice of one's life or maybe a projection of the life they want to live. Anybody who isn't a fool should realize that. As a frequent facebooker and hardcore extrovert, with a lack of a strong filter, I find this whole situation to be a dilemma. What is worse, reading about someone's awesome day and seeing a picture of how fabulous they looked during their awesome day, or reading about their terrible day, looking at angry political memes, or rants about the bad customer service they received? Do you want to read about how someone had the best night ever with their bestest buds (you not included) or that they have been ...

Tips for Transitioning to Back-To-School Time

Transitions can be hard for kids with special needs, making the back-to-school schedule particularly challenging for them and their families. Here are some tips for making that transition, and first few months of the fall, easier for everyone. Map out a Schedule and Reduce Anxiety While no kid wants to start talking about going back to school when he or she is still enjoying their summer vacation, it’s important to reduce anxiety by starting to talk about what the back-to-school schedule is going to look like. While this could mean creating a visual schedule or developing a calendar, it’s important to talk with your child about what the back-to-school schedule is going to look like, including wake up time, what happens during the day, after school, right up until bedtime. Developing a schedule can hopefully alleviate some of your child's stress about what to expect during the transition and can also open up a dialogue for what questions and concerns your child has. Have your chil...