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Showing posts from February, 2016

Rough Around the Edges

My in-laws and I were recently reminiscing about the good old days when Andy and I began dating. It wasn't the first time we joked about how I didn't exactly make the most sparkling first impression. Andy's mom told me that, after one of my first visits, his dad referred to me as "rough around the edges". According to www.thefreedictonary.com, if a person has rough edges it means she does not behave well or politely. You may be thinking that this isn't something a woman wants to be called by her in-laws but you have to understand that my joke to Andy is that his parents love me more than him; that I'm the daughter they never had. Over the years, my tough exterior has won them over and we can laugh about our early relationship. In short, I agree with them. The definition seems consistent with my own perception of my younger self. It was partially nature, partially nurture, which gave me a prickly exterior. I was raised in a rural area by blue collar pare…

If He Only Had a Heart

I have feelings. Lots of feelings. I'm always feeling. Many of my statements begin with "I feel" rather than "I think". My memories of events or conversations are often impressions based on how I felt rather than facts about what was said or was happening. I make decisions based on how I'm feeling, or how I think others are feeling, or will feel. I cry during commercials. I love to hug people. I feel fullest in life when I'm connected to my emotions, and when I can positively express those emotions. Having a non-neuro-typical kid has been a challenge for me. Of course, it goes without saying, that it has been emotionally challenging for me. Going through the journey of realizing Caroline was different, and looking for answers and help, was taxing for me. I felt sad and angry and frustrated and scared. However, I decided several years ago to try to set the emotions aside and be more pragmatic about parenting her. I go into doctor and teacher meetings wi…