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Have you seen my baby?

Have you seen my baby? She's little; fits in your arms easily; has big brown eyes and soft blond curls; smells like baby; says googoogaa; is immobile. You get the picture, right? My little baby angel has been replaced by a full-fledged waddler. It started around Christmas but really accelerated when she took her first bold steps a month ago. Before my eyes this baby has turned into a person. A little one, which makes everything she does very funny.

Just when you start to adapt to your ever-changing child, she goes and changes on you overnight or in the blink of an eye. Let me tell you about what Caroline can do in the blink of an eye: climb over a bucket-barrier onto the fireplace. Unplug a lamp and lick the plug. Unravel a roll of toilet paper or pull every tissue out of a box. Explode into a diva fit and slam her head into my chin. Pull every tupperware lid from the drawer and throw them all over the kitchen. Tip the dog's food dish over. Find the phone and dial a number. Run from a table into the kitchen of a restaurant. She could be in the Guinness Book of World Records for most tasks completed in under a minute. Maybe I should see if she can eat a piece of white bread next?

Long gone are the days of clean face, clean hair and little coos. Common sounds around our house now are loud, screamish giggles and babble-talk. Our doe-eyed baby sitting tri-pod is now a blueberry face, neck, hand, arm and sometimes back-covered tyrant dragging anything she can in tow, from freshly folded laundry, important paperwork to a spray bottle. The answer to every question is a shake of the head "no". And, forget walking anywhere without having her attached to your waist like a barnacle. Didn't she just learn to walk? Why does she insist on being carried? Do you know how hard it is to put on pants with a 25 lb worm squirming on your hip?

Let me know if you see my baby anywhere. She was recently spotted in a Snapfish photo album but has yet to reveal herself in the flesh. I'm not sure she'll ever be back so I guess I'd just better hold onto this crazy little person for as a long as I can.


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